I just want to start this post off by saying… my joonie Saaghi is on to something about these Indian boys. No joke.
But honestly, why it is that we are SO set on dating the perfect Irooni boy? The doctor, engineer… lawyer? What is it about these damn Iranian boys that we just can’t seem to get enough of? Do they treat us like queens? Umm not typically. Are they packing it? … NOT compared to Indian boys (true story).
It seems like Persian girls are either settling for the aaaariiiiteee Persian guy JUST to date a Persian guy… or they are looking to rebel for the GOD FORBID BLACK GUY. That’s right ladies… I’m bringing this to attention now: we as Persian girls have some sort of fetish for black guys. Why is that? I’ll leave it to Saaghi to analyze that one, but for now: consider this– is it because they are like forbidden fruit for us? My dad told me YEARS ago that he would be “okay” if I dated someone that wasn’t Iranian… AS LONG AS THEY WEREN’T BLACK! I mean really?
Not only is that incredibly racist… but (ATTN: THIS IS THE CASE WITH EVERY RACE/ETHNICITY/BACKGROUND/ETC.) there are good … and bad. What if Obama had been my black boyfriend back in the day? Would my father have forbidden me to date the guy that would someday become our president? (Seriously, how much would that suck).
But growing up, my family rarely approved of who I was dating UNLESS he was Persian. White? Their response: “ahhh he is okay… vat does he study? No doctor…???!?!!” Italian? Their response: “ehhh he LOOKS Persian.” And so it continued until that fateful day in college when I was introduced to the world of gay clubs. Ladies, if you want to let loose and dance with some FINE ASS MEN, go to a gay bar. NOT EVEN PLAYING. You can let loose, dance like a freak, and drink up without any judgement or any creepers grinding up on you! Now, I’m not necessarily proud of this particular story, but I think we all date someone some point in our lives who is… a little different than what we would normally go for. But personally, I blame my crazy parents for consistently making me feel insecure in EVERY GUY I ever dated, EVEN IF he was the top student in our math class (“eh he isn’t Irooni? How could that be?”)
OK BACK TO THE STORY- The one other GREAT thing about gay bars/clubs? HOT HOT HOT (and typically straight) bartenders… and (drumroll please…) gogo dancers!!!!!! That’s right. To my parent’s horror, I dated a gogo dancer. I’d just like to say this was COMPLETELY unlike me- I’m known for dating the dorkiest of the dorks- smart guys… not hot… the usual standard Persian engineer (sometimes white…) I mean, who the hell honestly dates a gogo dancer? But its like our “black phases” or bringing home the bad boy that our parents hate. After being told “no no no no no no no no no” SO many times, we end up making a decision that …. isn’t exactly the brightest. Obviously, gogo boy and I didn’t last very long- but it was definitely a lesson learned:
Lesson 1: Don’t date a guy that dances in his underwear for money… for guys. That just means there isn’t a whole lot he wouldn’t do.
Lesson 2: Just because your parents say “no” to every other type of guy out there, doesn’t mean they are right. Never settle because your parents told you THIS is correct/right/meant to be, etc. More than likely, it isn’t. We are all unique. What worked for them PROBABLY won’t work for you. (BUT it also doesn’t mean you should get crazy and date someone that is just completely outrageous).
Lesson 3: (and most important) We all make mistakes whether its dating a gogo dancer or rejecting Obama as your black boyfriend, but the best way to bounce back– is to learn from it. Not only will I NEVER date a gogo dancer again, but I know exactly the kind of guy I want to be with- whether he is White, Asian, Black, Hispanic, OR PERSIAN. It is MY decision.
Arite joonies, that’s all for now- what’s your type? Make me feel better, did you ever date a gogo dancer? (No? Just me? AWESOME). Email us at firstname.lastname@example.org