Freedom of Date

My mum - who unlike many Egyptian mothers does not care that I’m 22 and single –  recently asked me if I would like to “meet” the son of one of her friends.

Apparently, the guy’s parents were on the hunt for a wife. My answer was a scowl the size of Africa and I was surprised that the woman who raised me to be a no-bullshit, independent woman would make such an offer.

“Yasmine, I didn’t say marry him or even date him, I said meet him”, she said in exasperation.

“Yes mum, but why on earth would a 25-year-old man get his parents to find him a wife? Something must be seriously wrong with his social life.”

She dropped the conversation. Hmm, I thought to myself, did this guy actually ask his parents for this, or are they volunteering to put an end to his bachelorhood?

fail

Growing up, I was always surrounded by negative attitudes on being set up on dates by your folks.

My parents for one, never sought that path because they believed in their children’s’ independent ability to find what is right for them in life. And yet that afternoon when my mum made her unusual offer, she prompted me to ask several questions.

First of all, why do many of us have such a negative attitude towards meeting guys through our folks? [Read more...]

Something I Never Want to be a Part Of

Joons,

It’s been awhile since we’ve had a guest post and we all know you get a little tired of us from time to time– plus, there’s only so much sex we can have… at once… (joke).  Please meet Holly Dagres- Iranian American- Aslan Media Columnist- Researcher for Cairo Review- World Traveler- Bad Ass of All Things Middle East – this list could really go on for an entire post so check out her website (click here).  

Joonies, I like to pride myself on being an Iranian-American with having the unique opportunity to grow up in Iran during my teenage years. It’s definitely given me a nuanced perspective of things people don’t often look profoundly into. Coming from divorced parents, the idea of marriage has always been approached with caution. It’s no wonder that when the topic of “khastegaris” (marriage proposals) comes up, I tend to cringe at how simple people choose their significant others.

Ever since I could remember, I’ve had mothers running up to me on street corners, asking if I had not wed yet. This is just based off of my not so Iranian features, which consists of fair skin (you’ll learn why that’s important in a moment).

Then there was the one neighbor who offered my mother a ‘business deal’– my hand in marriage for her son.

[Read more...]

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