Life After College Sucks _____.

Hello there Joonies :) It’s Saaghi.

By now, all the graduates of 2013 have graduated already. And while I’ve never had any long-term dreams of being a commencement speaker, I think Mary Schmich had it right:

Inside every adult, lurks a graduation speaker dying to get out.

I barely count as an adult, but I’ve hit that one year post-graduation mark where I really wish I could stand at a podium and rain on everyone’s festive parade. I’d like to tell my peers how it really goes down— because it’s not just about sunscreen. (is my bitter showing?) From what I gather after talking to people aged 22-26, I’m not the only one who wishes someone would’ve told them straight up that Life after College sucks. I’ve mentally noted some of the reasons, thus far, I believe that to be true…

Welcome Graduates of 2013 to the real world where ‘Confused and Sarcastic’ is the new black.

image

I left the wonderful and fuzzy bubble of my undergrad years to deal with an extremely new lifestyle: a real job in a different city, away from home.  And right away, I hated it and I wished my Alma Mater could have taken me back for another 4 years. 

Things got a little better when I received my first paycheck, I felt like…

And it was all exciting, picking a place to live, being “independent”. But then this sudden sense of doom hit, and I realized somethings will never be the same. [Read more…]

Jungle Fever > Baby Fever

JOONIEEEES.

Happy Monday!  I’m sure you’re all as excited as I am to start the week.  No really, for once I’m not hating on Monday because T-4 days till the weekend baby!

Anyway, I know here at S&F, we talk a lot about Persian parents and obviously sex.  But I’m over it.  I’ve decided no more sex for me… and no more parents…

Lies… where would I be without my crazy parents and crazy sex?   [Read more…]

I Don’t Give a F#ck About Your Sadness

Hey joonie joons,

Have you ever been on a date with a guy who just talks… and talks… and talks… and an hour drags by, and not only have you COMPLETELY lost your appetite (which isn’t normal for you) but he probably hasn’t asked a single question about YOU.

You just kinda sit there looking bored as fuck yet… he still doesn’t get the hint AND KEEPS ON YAPPING about who the fuck knows what– all you hear is “Yeah I’m awesome… bla … bla… please take this stick out of my ass,” when really he’s probably saying something more like, “Yeah I’m awesome… because this one time at band camp…”

Can I switch my date to the guy sitting over there?

What is it with guys these days?  They either call you because they want to tell you about all the great things going on in their lives… or they hang out with you because they just like to hear themselves talk.  Self absorbed with a side of cocky?  YEP.  Excuse my bluntness: but… I’m annoyed.  

*disclaimer: I am fully aware that not every guy is like this.

um I’m about to shoot myself in the face now, thanks

Remember those days when guys used to complain that women talk for hours on end and only text them when we need something?  OVER.

I have a theory:

 As women start to become successful, men feel the need to overcompensate.

Case in Point:

My last boyfriend was a great guy- on the outside.  He had his Master’s degree (in something unusual), we had the same interests, and his Farsi was great (is it just me or is that really hot).  Then one day, I started noticing that he would change the subject when I would mention something exciting that happened to me.  I didn’t brag… I was just excited to share it with someone that I cared about, and thought the feeling was mutual.

Then BAM out of the blue, he broke up with me the night before I started my first grown-up job.  Why?  Because I got a job before he did.  (GROSS)

Now, as we try to be friends, he only contacts me when he wants to say something about himself.

For example: “I did this today!” or “I got this opportunity today!” ME… ME… ME… Umm hi, I’m a person too- thanks for remembering.

In order  for a friendship to work- BOTH people must be engaged- you want to share your stories… and you should ask to hear theirs, no matter how insignificant it is to you.

In order for a relationship to work, BOTH people must support each other- no matter what punches life throws your way.

No one wants to deal with a guy who is going to act like this:

… AAAND I’m over it

Talk about the ultimate turn-OFF.

I understand that need –> the need to prove you’re not a total fuck up.  But keep the sharing to a minimum.  Just like guys, girls like a little mystery too.  Plus, we can usually tell within the first 10 seconds of talking to you whether you’re really a fuck-up or just having a difficult time.

The more you seem interested in us, the more we will be interested in you.  

Only people like Snooki believe this… DON’T be a Snooki

Joonies: take it from someone who learned the hard way– don’t waste your time on someone who isn’t secure enough to handle your successes.  At the end of the day, it will feel so much better when you find someone that does.

Its kinda like the song: You’re so vain.  You probably think this “post” is about you, don’t you? 

Sorry but, not everything is about YOU so do us a favor, and GET OVER YOURSELF. 

Disagree?  Am I the one that needs to get over myself or do I just suck at picking the “right” guys

SEXANDFESSENJOON@GMAIL.COM

FACEBOOK US 

Always keepin’ it real,

FARRAH فراه


%d bloggers like this: