New Beginnings: Be Vulnerable

I’ve always viewed vulnerability as a weakness. Another way for someone to walk all over you… hurt you… take advantage of you. To me, strength had nothing to do with the physical. It was all about your mentality – no one can touch you.

Photos via reorientmag.tumblr.com

Photos via reorientmag.tumblr.com

As a result, I’ve distanced myself from many relationships, specifically romantic relationships. I thought that to be a strong woman, you must never give someone the power to hurt you – especially a man. 

And I’ve never been more wrong.

When one of my past relationships ended things with me a few years ago, I was so angry at myself. I was angry because I had depended on him, I allowed myself to open up and show him a real side of me. Post-breakup, it felt like he had some sort of power of me… he knew me like no one else did and that made him the most powerful man to stand over meI vowed to never be in that situation again and it took me a long time to forgive myself (and really all men) for having to deal with that pain in the first place.

Three years later, I look back at the relationships I’ve had since and I can’t help but think that none of them have had any depth or realness to them.

I’m always looking for new experiences, but only if its on my terms.

And frankly, all that tells me now is that I’m just plain scared.

The inability to be vulnerable is the equivalent of being fearful. I may as well stay home because I don’t have the guts to go and put myself out there – and there’s nothing that shouts WEAKNESS quite like that.

For my “new beginnings,” I want to learn how to be vulnerable. I want to lose the fear of having my heart broken because without heartbreak, you never learn. You never grow as a person and your dating life never expands to a wider range of men/experiences (you just keep going back to the same thing especially when you don’t have any past mistakes to learn from). 

I’ve made mistakes but I’ve shielded myself from the pain of it by not letting myself feel too much. I truly can’t think of a more cowardly move than that.

To be vulnerable is to be strong.

So here’s to a year of learning how to be damn vulnerable.

SEXANDFESSENJOON@GMAIL.COM

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TWEET AT ME: @FARRAH_JOON

xoxo,

FARRAH فرح

Afsoon: You Are The Tomato to My Kabob

We wanted to do something special for Norooz this year and when we saw Golreezan’s designs, we knew we had to give the designer some eshgh. The talented and creative Afsoon Talai – if you haven’t sent your custom-made Norooz/Tavalod cards yet, then you are clearly missing out. She’s a graphic designer extraordinaire – truly talented and we’re especially digging this Norooz card she made personally for SexandFessenjoon

sf

We are excited to see what’s in store for Golreezan and Afsoon.  We hope you enjoy her interview and beautiful designs! Happy Norooz! 

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Come to My Fire Party

Heyyyy Joooooooons,

March is one of my favorite months: spring is right around the corner (though stifled by the freak snowfalls we get) but furthermore Norooz is upon us! I find it a much more endearing and sacred way to celebrate a new year versus its Gregorian counterpart. I set up my haft-seen (on my snake tank because there’s no space in my small apartment) and looking forward to the blessings and implications of a new year.

sofre

Every year, the family and I celebrate Norooz on campus at the University of Minnesota, where student group PSOM (Persian Student Organization of Minnesota) plans a fantastic Norooz celebration in tandem with university resources, the local Persian market, and other organizations. It’s a lovely event with dinner and dancing for the entire community in the Twin Cities.

Norooz has always been one of my favorite times of the year because of all the time spent with family/friends, the well wishing and gift exchanging, and of course, the feasts. Even the sight of a haft-seen makes my heart soar. [Read more…]

MAKE IT RAIN, ITS 1391

JOONS, we can’t claim we rep Iranian/Persian roots if we don’t put up a NOWROUZ/Norooz/EID post.

We’re taking a minute out of our super busy day (who else left cleaning and showering for the last minute?) to wish you all a very Happy New Year.

1391 style.

No not 1391 A.D, That would be the Spanish Inquisition.

[Read more…]

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