A #Persian Thanksgiving

Persian Thanksgiving: (noun), a glorified mehmooni, under the guise of an American holiday.

When you arrive, there are two social groups: 

1) Everyone under 35

2) Everyone important.

source: makeagif
source: makeagif

There’s a feeling of dread because there’s always a few people you’d rather not see..ever. 

source: giphy
source: giphy

In the beginning,on an empty stomach, small talk is hard. 

uneasybigboy

But after some ghormeh sabzi, everyone is BFFs. 

source: giphy
source: giphy

Party starts at 2, a.k.a 3:30, a.k.a 5. 

winstonlol
source: giphy

So basically you’re fasting.

source: reactiongifs
source: reactiongifs

There’s always some older Persian woman in the food line making small talk with you, while you’re just like..

source: tumblr
source: tumblr

Even the stretchiest pants in the world can’t prepare you for this feast.

Screen Shot 2014-11-27 at 1.05.03 PM
source: instagram, saaghi_joon

Even when you tell yourself to stop, you realize you can steal some extra Tadig and it’s extra crispy today.

emalol
source: giphy

No one actually cares about the Turkey, and that’s kind of sad. 

source: giphy
source: giphy

You lose count of how many drinks you’ve had. Persian Tea drinks, that is.  

persian tea

Leaving is the hardest part. As in, it’s physically hard to get up and leave and smile and say “Khodahafez” to everyone. 

source: giphy
source: giphy

Just make sure your pants are zipped. 

source: giphy
source: giphy

& finally, Happy Thanksgiving.

Manly Nose Monday

For this edition of #ManlyNoseMonday we have some nose-y Iranian and non-Iranian actors.

But have you ever seen a manlier nose than this? Guess who it belongs to.

source: celebstoner

source: celebstoner

(Revealed at the end.)

Amir Arison

tall, dark and schnozzy. Loving it.

source: zimbio

source: zimbio

Bahram Radan

Jesus never looked so good.

source: flixster

source: flixster

 

Haaz Sleiman

Screen Shot 2014-07-07 at 4.48.41 PM

 

Liam Neeson

liam nee

Arian Moayed

source: NBC

source: NBC

And finally, if you didn’t guess before, that nose belongs to..

OWEN WILSON

owen wilson

What other actors would you add?

MANLY NOSE MONDAY: Founding Fathers edition

It’s Monday, and we’ve got another edition of #ManlyNoseMonday. In honor of 4th of July, here are the founding fathers of the manly nose trend.

But first, can you guess which manly man this manly nose belongs to?

Screen Shot 2014-06-30 at 11.23.45 AM

We’ll reveal it at the end.

For now, feast your eyes on Paul Newman’s slightly crooked-on-one-side, strong nose..

source: theplace2.ru
source: theplace2.ru

Frank Sinatra

source: theconcertdatabase
source: theconcertdatabase

Behrouz Vossoughi

source: flixster

source: flixster

Our mystery manly nose belongs to..

al pacin

AL PACINO.

AND A SPECIAL SHOUT OUT TO OUR JOONIES’ NOMINATIONS:

Saif Ali Khan

source: bollywoodlife

source: bollywoodlife

ADRIEN BRODY.

source: theapricity

source: theapricity

George RR Martin

source: vixenvarsity

source: vixenvarsity

DANIEL ASHTARI.

source: facebook

source: facebook

WHO ELSE WOULD YOU ADD? WANT TO NOMINATE SOMEONE FOR #MANLYNOSEMONDAY? DROP US A COMMENT.

Manly Nose Monday

So I have a thing for strong noses; and when guys get nose jobs, it breaks my heart.

Wide-set hips attract men because they indicate fertility. Manly noses attract women because they indicate strength and bedroom skills.

Ok, I just made that up. While it may not scientifically point to anything, men do have larger noses than women.  And to me, a man who embraces his less-than-perfect nose is always sexier than one who decides to put a bandage over it.

So a big THANK YOU to all these guys for rockin’ what their maman’s gave them.

1. Amin Hayayi

source: whatsupiran

source: whatsupiran

2. These two.

source: getty images

source: getty images

3. Masoud Shojaei

source: photoaman

source: photoaman

4. Fares Fares

source: aceshowbiz

source: aceshowbiz

5. Marlon Brando

source: thehypebr

source: thehypebr

 6. David Gandy

source: luxuo

source: luxuo

he deserves a second picture.

source: modeglitter

source: modeglitter

7. Reza Marashi

source: abc

source: abc

8. Sam Nazarian

source: wikipedia

source: wikipedia

WHO ELSE WOULD YOU ADD? WANT TO NOMINATE SOMEONE FOR #MANLYNOSEMONDAY? DROP US A COMMENT.

#TeamMelli vs. Nigeria: The Highlights

The game ended with 0-0, but it was a roller coaster.

Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 10.13.24 PM

For us there were plenty of highlights.

Iroonis all over the world were cheering on #TeamMelli in their game against Nigeria — and people were getting creative.

We asked our Joonies to send us pics of how they were showing their fan pride, and we were not disappointed.

Compiling a list so you don’t have to look anywhere else, now get to scrolling…

One word, Hugs.

Source: twitter @PHLovefootball

Source: twitter @PHLovefootball

True Sportsmanship on the field.

source: twitter @yellownx

source: twitter @yellownx

Goalie or Model?

source: twitter @pedestrian

source: twitter @pedestrian

From Food Flags to Real Flags, here’s all the different ways we sent love to our national team:

BEST FAN LOOKS

source: twitter @squawka and @tribundergi

source: twitter @squawka and @tribundergi

bears'

source: twitter @therealsunnista

source: twitter @therealsunnista

In Brazil

Twitter: Negar Mortazavi

Twitter: Negar Mortazavi

In Brazil. Twitter: Negar Mortazavi

Twitter: Negar Mortazavi

Famous Iranian actor Mohammadreza Sharifinia

Famous actor Mohammadreza Sharifinia. Twitter: Negar Mortazavi

Twitter: Negar Mortazavi

IN VIENNA:

Nuclear talks delegation source: @ladanenasseri

Nuclear talks delegation source: @ladanenasseri

FROM LOS ANGELES:

source: twitter @sep_persian

source: twitter @sep_persian

SWEDEN:

source: twitter @denniszadeh

source: twitter @denniszadeh

LONDON:

source: twitter @tehranix

source: twitter @tehranix

FACEPAINT, EVERYWHERE:

Twitter: @fifaworldcup_fr

Twitter: @fifaworldcup_fr

source: twitter @AFP

source: twitter @AFP

EVEN ON PETS.

source: twitter @farboddanesh

source: twitter @farboddanesh

And cheetahs.

Twitter: Omid_M

Twitter: Omid_M

 A PERSIAN CAT EVEN WATCHED.

soure: twitter @ladanenasseri

soure: twitter @ladanenasseri

LOVE HAPPENED.

PDA

FOOD FLAGS. YES.

Pudding #Shirberenj #ricepudding & homemade pistachio & strawberry jam

Pudding #Shirberenj #ricepudding & homemade pistachio & strawberry jam

Twitter: @SimisKitchen

Twitter: @SimisKitchen

 FANS REPPING THE RED, WHITE & GREEN:

Twitter: @ShabnamRezaei

Twitter: @ShabnamRezaei

Instagram: @mehran_e

Instagram: @mehran_e

Instagram: @rod_oo

Instagram: @rod_oo

Instagram: @shadan214

Instagram: @shadan214

NAIL ART:

source: twitter @adayinthelalz

source: twitter @adayinthelalz

source: twitter @persianintrigue

source: twitter @persianintrigue

Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 10.11.05 PM

A FASHIONABLE OUTFIT:

source: instagram @bibifatemeh

source: instagram @bibifatemeh

Fans also took notice of how FIIINE the players were (check out the hottest ones here):

Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 8.35.42 PM

Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 9.58.19 PM

Best Tweets:

Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 8.48.19 PM

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Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 8.54.05 PMScreen Shot 2014-06-16 at 8.53.06 PM

From Saaghi & Farrah:
Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 9.57.46 PM

Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 10.17.08 PM

President Hassan Rouhani also had a few words to share (tweet):

Source: Twitter @HassanRouhani

Source: Twitter @HassanRouhani

 

Source: Twitter @HassanRouhani

Source: Twitter @HassanRouhani

Joonies, let’s continue to

Screen Shot 2014-06-16 at 10.56.59 AM

ANYTHING WE MISSED?

 

English Idioms That Make No Sense to My Immigrant Parents

Everything on this list is always lost in translation.

 

The Word ‘Idiom’ -

 

huh, like idiot?
source: giphy

source: giphy

Break a leg!

no, tank you.
source: giphy

source: giphy

You’re Pulling My Leg!

but i’m not touching your leg?
source: giphy

source: giphy

Drop Him Like A Hot Potato

source: giphy

source: giphy

You’re Barking Up The Wrong Tree

VAAAT? I AM NOT A DOG.
source: giphy

source: giphy

Monkey See, Monkey Do

YOU ARE DE MONKEEY.
source: giphy

source: giphy

Elvis has left the building

source: giphy

source: giphy

Straight from the Horse’s Mouth

KHODET KHARI (trans: You’re a donkey).

source: giphy

source: giphy

When Pigs Fly

I don’t understand.

source: giphy

source: giphy

You Scratch my back, I’ll Scratch Yours

source: giphy

source: giphy

It’s Raining Cats and Dogs

no, it’s not.

source: giphy

source: giphy

The Twilight Zone

source: giphy

source: giphy

Too Many Balls in the Air

Keep your balls vhere dey belong.

source: giphy

source: giphy

Put your foot in your mouth

ew.

source: giphy

source: giphy

Lose your marbles

You amerikans. Eeenglish is a veird language.

source: giphy

source: giphy

What else would you add?

Everything You Missed | The Weekly Roundup

Here’s what you missed this week:

recite-10107--1756000305-1sdgr3q

How is the English language so impoverished that we do not have a word for the glory of rice brought nearly to a scorch at the bottom of a pot? … In Persian cuisine, it is tahdig and merits almost its own subgenre, with variations from potatoes to lettuce layered beneath rice in a heavy pan.

  • The Imam Reza Shrine in Mashhad, Iran deserves some hype, and HuffPost agrees.
  • Moroccan Artist, Fatima Mazmouz, using her own pregnancy and art to break stereotypes about femininity. It ain’t all pretty all the time.
  • Yes, Iranians also know how to skateboard. On the Azadi Tower.
  • The clothing scene in Iran is transforming into a “hipper” style… and designers are making a splash all across social media.

submit links for the weekly roundup here! 

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Everything You Missed | The Weekly Roundup

Here’s what you missed this week:

special needs

  • We all know Tehrangeles has it going on – Iranian restaurants, ice cream shops, cafes, and hookah bars. But who knew India has some of the oldest Iranian cafes around?
  • A story of Forgiveness and the most emotional story from the week: Iranian man spared from execution by the parents of the man he killed.
  • Speaking of eating, there is a fake Chipotle in Iran and it may looks better than the real one. Seriously.
  • Mohammad Ali Ziaei is the center of attention with his Iranian Caricatures (and even the non-Iranian ones).
  • Iranians invented math, ghormeh sabzi, and pajamas. You’re welcome world.
  • The clothing scene in Iran is transforming into a “hipper” style… and designers are making a splash all across social media.
Source: reorientmag.tumblr.com

Source: reorientmag.tumblr.com

submit links for the weekly roundup here! 

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Top 5 Hottest Persian Rappers

It is time to rank these bad boys (and girl!).

#5

yasYas 

Deep and brooding. Hi.

#4

erfanErfan

He’s made a lot of music. But we won’t let that distract us from what’s really important…that perfect scruff.

#3

sogandSogand

To be an Iranian female in the rap game, you have to be bad ass. Sogand is also stunning.

#2

mehrad hidden
Mehrad Hidden

We could’ve included anyone from ZedBazi on this list, but this guy’s voice just makes us want to undress- very quickly.

#1

behzad leito

Behzad Leito

Basically, his face is everything.

And those lips…

He may be younger than us, but age ain’t nothing but a number in this case.

another one for the road:

behzad leito 2

Disagree with our ranking? Let us know how you’d rate these hotties.

16 Reasons Why Middle Easterners Are Crushing it

Crushing it since 3,500 B.C. 

B0024P 0019

I am a Middle Easterner, and I approve of this message.

1. We have shame, therefore we have class.

classy

we may be obnoxious, but we’ll never be sloppy. Our mommas taught us better than that.

2. Middle Easterners are never late, White People are always early.

When white people are running late… running lat And when Middle Easterners are running late…

strolling

3. Our Reaction to everything is usually,

white people

4. We’re good at Math and Science, because we invented Math and Science.

yeah science

Our ancestors knew what was up.

5. We don’t have to look for our ancestors on Ancestry.com

ancestry

#sorrynotsorry

6. We’ll always be scared of our parents.

yes sir

And therefore, we’ll always respect them. Fore, they gave us life– and lots of traumatic and embarrassing experiences.

7. Our parents will let us move back in with them, even at age 45.

Rent Free.

snl lol

8. If there is a shortcut to anything, we will find it.

Assigned readings in college? We walk in like…

readings lol

 And still raise our hands to participate.

9. Every Middle Easterner knows that a deadline is actually the last date to ask for an extension.

shortcuts

Our nonchalant attitude isn’t arrogance, it’s just that…

10. Nothing’s ever that serious.

do not care

11. Except when it is.

celebrate

12. Middle Eastern hospitality is the stuff legends are made of.

Looking for small bites or hors d’oeuvres? umm…

time for that

We willingly starve ourself before our gatherings just to make sure we can feast like kings.

Everyone else has parties that end at a decent hour, like 9pm. Middle Eastern parties are like marathons. We love to feed, entertain, and then gossip about it all.

13. We’re all about equal opportunity shit-talking.

I ain’t even mad about it.

aint even mad

And since it’s equal, its fair right?

14. Holding Grudges is a testament to how great our memory is.

When someone wrongs you, it’s like…

kobe lol

Forgive and forget? Bitch, please.

15. Black Tie is never optional, it’s necessary.

suit pajamas

suit pajamas.

Dress down for what?

16. Finally, once you get past our hard exterior

we’re the warmest and kindest people you’ll ever know.

big bird snl

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Middle Eastern and Crushing it,

SAAGHI ساقی
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