Do I Have It All?

Holly Dagres – Middle East commentator, world traveler, and joooon. Here’s what she has to say: 

You know the song, “Independent Woman” by Destiny’s Child?  The likes of those kind of lyrics are what I live by.  Even better, the unknowing feminist, Margaret Thatcher had a good line (I’m not a Thatcherite by the way),

I will never be one of those women, who stays silent and pretty on the arm of her husband. Or remote and alone in the kitchen doing the washing up for that matter. One’s life must matter. Beyond all the cleaning, cooking and the children – one’s life must matter more than that… I will not die washing a teacup.

Ironically, Lady Gaga had an even more concise quote,  “Some women choose to follow men, and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you’re wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn’t love you anymore.”

gaga

Point being, that’s the kind of motto I live by.

I don’t want to be a pushover; I don’t want to be just somebody’s wife. I don’t want to be left stranded if the man I love decides to get up and leave, cheat, or God forbid dies on me. [Read more…]

We Play By My Rules

Joon joons,

Thanks to Hurricane Sandy, I’ve been quarantined off to my room for the past day (and tomorrow).  Crazy wind and rain got nothing on me – I’m still kicking. To all our readers on the East Coast — stay safe and dry.  Sandy can’t touch this.

I’m not really a fan of break-ups.  For obvious reasons, I’m sure most of us aren’t. If I’m the one who wants to do the dumping, I will do everything in my power to avoid it and encourage the other person to do it for me.  I’m so mature, clearly.

My go-to move: “let’s take a break” in hopes that in those few days, the guy will come to his senses.  That rarely happens.

Honesty is always the best policy.

The one time I was dumped when it wasn’t on my terms – it devastated me.  Love was never really a factor and my lack of worthy relationship experience didn’t really prepare me for what followed the breakup.

I turned into one of those girls that I’d always looked down at — crying constantly…

I started my job the day after he dumped me so having to be the “new girl” with a fake smile on my face was probably one of the hardest things in my first few weeks of work.  I couldn’t eat my lunch, I would escape to the bathroom to keep tears from falling in front of everyone, and I cried everyday on the metro back home after work.

There’s nothing wrong with any of that — sometimes you just have to purge out your pain but…

The real world isn’t going to wait for you to sulk over your ex-boyfriend. [Read more…]

What Will You Give Me?

JOONIES!

Happy Monday… more importantly, T-4 TILL FRIDAY.  Yeah, Fridays are my favorite.

Leeet’s get right to it.  This is something I’ve been thinking about/bothered by for awhile now… I used to think it was just in my head until I had a conversation with a friend recently who’s slightly older than me.  She’s in her late-20’s and single.  NOTHING wrong with that, ya dig?  But in Persian standards, that is the epitome of torshideh.

Our culture thrives on this notion that if a woman isn’t married before she hits 28 then she is somehow incapable.

Doesn’t look so torshideh to me.

[Read more…]

I Dated My Dad

JOONS:

It’s true… I dated my father– but not in the way you think (don’t be gross).  NOT literally.

We’ve all heard this before:

Girls always end up with someone like their father and boys end up with someone like their mother.

And if they’re Persian boys– it only makes sense.  They’re going to be attracted to someone who will nurture and care for their doodooltala-ness (let’s be real).

My dad never really cared for the guys I brought home.  He was always nice to them (aka never had any guns attached to his waist), but he never connected with on a personal level — he was never excited to hang out with them.

Then again, I haven’t given him much material to work with.  My dating history is as bad as the sour milk still in the fridge.  I’ve dated anyTHING from a cheating loser to a dependent bacheh (child) who couldn’t go down the escalator without holding my hand (THERE’S ONLY ROOM FOR ONE PERSON PER STEP).

[Read more…]

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