Hello my dear Joonies,
I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving and are completely stuffed with Turkey and Ghormeh Sabzi stuffing (because let’s be real, a Persian Thanksgiving always includes… rice or kabob or some type of khoresht).
Anyway, not to put a HUGE damper on the festivities, but I decided this might be the perfect time to bring up a topic we all love to talk about… but hate in action: THE BREAK-UP. We’ve all been there- whether we have been the dumper or dumpee. I will admit, I’ve dumped numerous guys without even thinking once about how it made them feel… until it happened to me. I’ve seen it all: guy cheated, lost interest, lives went in separate directions, etc. And then there is the grieving period where we drown ourselves with ice cream (or in my case- pizza) and cry ourselves to sleep, wishing that things were different.
There’s no easy way to say this: being broken-hearted fucking sucks. What’s the point of starting a relationship with someone if its just going to end up with you being the one to get hurt? That’s what I used to always think and I always tried to stay away from it- whether it was in college or even after when I started meaningless 2 month relationships just to end it once I got “annoyed.” But recently, I was hit with this realization: It might hurt throughout your entire body when your heart gets broken, but sometimes its necessary to let go of things that we cling to so dearly to make room for something better. Everything happens for a reason. He may have seemed perfect then, but if he can’t handle you getting a new job, or throwing plates at his head every once in awhile, then he’s just not meant for you– know what I’m sayin’? So for all your joonies out there crying over some douchebag who just can’t appreciate how wonderful you are, dry those tears– because I promise you there is someone better. And if you’re still high off the breakup and feel the need to bash him for his piece of shit attitude, then feel free to tell us ALL about it: firstname.lastname@example.org
One contributor recently shared her story with us. After being dumped by someone she thought she would be with forever, she decided to write her feelings (instead of egging his house) and her letter to the asshat is printed below for our lovely “Douche of the Week” series. Read it, sympathize, and know that you’re NOT the only one out there going through some type of pain caused by a worthless guy you’re better off without anyway.
I don’t even know where to begin. There are so many things I want to say that I could never say to your face and for the sake of my sanity, I just need to get it out. I don’t know where things went wrong. Everything felt so perfect. I was so happy and I was so sure that you were too. Maybe I was just blinded. Maybe I never really knew you like I thought I did. I have to admit, there were times where I felt something was off, deep down I knew something was wrong- but I always justified it with some worthless excuse.
You promised me that you were in this for the long run and that you truly cared about me. You introduced me to your family and took such a seemingly serious interest to learn about mine. I felt comfortable to let my guard down and for the first time in my entire life, be completely vulnerable with the guy I was with. You made me feel safe and insisted that I could depend on you. Why would you do that if you were just planning on leaving me in the end?
Even after months of being together, I still got butterflies in my stomach every time I was about to see you. Did you not feel the same way? What did I do wrong? For the first time in my entire life, I feel like one of the girls I always look down at. One of those girls who just commits their heart to someone irrationally… I was thinking with my heart, not my brain.
I am so mad at you. So mad at you for putting me in this situation. So mad at you for convincing me that you were for real. But most of all, I’m sorry. I’m sorry that your jealousy and competitiveness got in the way of a wonderful relationship. No matter what you think, we weren’t just good on paper- we were great in execution and it was your selfishness that got in the way. You’re a coward and after months of blindly falling for you, I can finally see that now. People say that everyone gets their heart broken at one point in their lives, and I guess now its my turn. Despite the pain I feel now, I know that one day, I will get over this. But I hope that you look back and utterly regret the decision you made. And when that day comes, I can assure you: I will no longer be there hoping that we can work things out.