Oh Shit, My Mascara is Running!


Sh*t’s about to get real. Today, we’re talking about identity and association.

The sculpting of the self is often determined by what we do and don’t do, what we like or dislike, and our values as stated by family and society. And as we grow, our identities and identifications are constantly shifting to adapt our most current state. Sometimes I look back on phases I had or beliefs I held, and I either laugh or shudder. I’ll probably be doing the same thing next year at this time.

But the universal constant in my world that so far hasn’t changed is the obsessive need to have perfect eyebrows.

ccMy eyebrows hold my livelihood, personality, and, frankly, a deeper need in their hairs and arches.

My maman bozorg came to Minnesota when I was six years old to live with us indefinitely. Some of my childhood memories are of her beautiful hands holding a brown pencil she would lift again and again to her face in order to shape, sculpt, and create magnificent eyebrows.

She was a strange woman to me, even though I knew she was my grandma, but this shyness never dissuaded me from watching her create those eyebrows. She still kills it today as a nearly 80-year-old woman.

From childhood on, I began noticing a trend amongst all the Persian women I met: they had AMAZING eyebrows.

mikePerfectly groomed, trimmed, arched, and tapered. Their thick black brow hairs were stacked neatly in an orderly row and framed by sharp and intent angles that faded into effortless and sweeping ends. No stray hairs. No irregular shapes or lines.

I started equating good brows with beauty, and I equated beauty with Persian women…

… thus logically I slowly birthed a long-harbored obsession that having perfect and symmetrical eyebrows would define me as Persian. As beautiful. As successful and adored and exotic and irresistible.Truth be told, I have often found myself extremely jealous of other Persian women because of their thick, wonderful hair and their eyebrows that seem effortless!

mtIt’s like looking at a woman with a great pair of breasts and suddenly feeling like you have to wear pushups and use tissues to fill it out to be convincing and attractive like her.

I have always lamented about my brows not being naturally thick enough to just wax or thread and voilà! Perfect! I have spent literally YEARS perfecting my own brow routine to create a thick and defined shape without looking “fake.” Through the trials and errors of mascaras, pencils, crayons, waxes, and fillers, I have found my routine. As long as my eyebrows look good, then I’m set.

A bad hair day in my world is a bad eyebrow day.

Oh shit the mascara is running, I need my brow brush, where is my crayon?

I have always believed in general that good eyebrows help define a face, but my need for perfect eyebrows every day sometimes borders on unhealthy.

Is it that I want to look good? Or that I want to look Persian?




Abroo kamoon,


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  1. dennisnaghizadeh says:

    Fesenjones would you like to be part of a big project / From Kababjoon

  2. Always carry MASCARA back up in bag when leaving the house (koko Channel )

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