The Evolution of Girl Code in Your 20s

Chicks before dicks… These were the rules I’ve lived by. Friends come first, not some dark-haired and dark-eyed amazing kisser waiting for you at home.

parksIn high school and college, I knew better than to date my friend’s crush or blow my girlfriends off for a night with the old ball and chain. There were just some things that were unforgivable when it came to meaningful friendships. 

As a woman-child, I’ve taken those invaluable lessons taught to me by my dear old friends, and I’ve integrated them into my current relationships. And frankly, that was probably not the smartest thing I’ve ever done.

Dating is very different in your mid to late 20’s compared to when you were 20.

loveWhen you’re younger, you don’t really think about foreverAt least for me, I lived in the moment. What was I doing that day and who I was seeing that night. It was easy for me to follow the “rules to being a good friend” because I wasn’t really thinking long-term/marriage with the guys I was dating. I was available to my friends 24/7 and if I wasn’t, they definitely let me know it.

And in all of that so called “loyalty,” I never once stopped to think, my friends might start thinking long-term/marriage with their guys. What will that mean for us? 

Is it fair of me to get mad at my friends for blowing me off when they’re talking about forever? 

That’s the whole point of dating, isn’t it? You’re looking for a partner, someone to have children and/or grow old with (if you’re into that sorta thing). Then why do we get so mad when our friends choose to hang out with their boyfriends rather than with us? If they end up together then they will be a package deal. It’s inevitable. 

friendsSo what’s the problem? No, I’m really asking. The whole notion of “chicks before dicks” and “bros before hoes” is a fake. It just doesn’t exist because…

in the end, you’re not walking down the aisle with your BFFL.

There’s “girl code” (because obviously you’d never steal someone’s man, that’s just morals) and then there’s unrealistic. I’ve come to realize the importance of supporting my friends and their relationships. I wouldn’t be happy if they bailed on me last minute or I didn’t see them for months (don’t disrespect). But with every relationship comes compromise otherwise no one is happy.

Don’t be a cockblock. 






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