Don’t you know that you’re toxic?

Hi Joonies.

Every time I blog, I rack my brain of something really witty to start a post off with. I can’t say it ever really works, but I’m just going to leave it to someone waaay more talented to give me an intro:

There are three things I value most in life:

1. My Family

2. Flaming Hot Cheetos

3. My Friends, a.k.a. Meth

(Sorry guys, Chester Cheeto has been there for me through errrthang)

I have all different sorts of Meth –tall, short, persian, not persian, etc. I love them all to pieces. And they’re all different types of crazy.  But what I’ve learned the hard way is:

Crazy is a much better adjective than Toxic.

I’ve had a few of those Poisonous Frenemies in my life, and I’m sure I’ll come across a few more. Unfortunately, it is the curse of friendship, you get a few bad eggs every season. Now, I have to point out that the difference between a BAD friend and a Toxic friend is very clear:

A Bad Friend is bad at friendship, a toxic friend makes friendship bad for you.

A Bad Friend is:

– Unreliable, Flaky, Selfish, A bad listener & Oblivious

But they’re not malicious. A bad friend is that one friend you have that you know

always talks about herself and her problems, and looks off into the sky when it is your chance to talk.

I usually have bad friends out of unfortunate or forced circumstances: work, family, mutual connection etc.

A Toxic Friend is:

– Jealous, Competitive, Insecure, Unhappy & Conniving

If a person possesses 4/5 above qualities, you won’t catch me near them–even with a ten foot pole.

Misery loves company, and those people really want you to join them. [Read more…]

One Year of Sex & Joon

2013 is here, and this past year has been a wild ride for S&F. We started at the end of 2011, and in all honesty, we didn’t know if anyone would read the sh!t we posted online. When in the second week, the site hit 100 views– it felt like we had hit the jackpot.

We’ve never really had expectations and that is probably why everything about Sex&Fessenjoon has just been a crazy surprise.


Nothing has been more surprising than how much it has become a part of who we each are – as writers for this site. So as an ode to a year of posts that covered everything from divorce to rape, we want to tell the story of what this blog has done for our lives.

the good & the bad.


Since this blog launched, I have gotten a lot of questions: Are you the writer for S&F? Do you know the writers? Who are they? 

Honestly, some people I lie to, and some I tell the truth. But now more recently, I find it so much harder to deny because it is a HUGE part of my life, in the sense that its something I invest a lot of time and effort in. I hold a full time job that sometimes requires 80+ hours/week– but there is not a day that goes by, that there is not AT LEAST one conversation between Farrah and I about Sex & Fessenjoon – whether its a blog post, brainstorming, strategy, interviews, etc.

You are what you do. and I do S&F. So I can’t keep it hidden.

Anonymity isn’t this wall that I hide behind, but it is how I protect the people that I love. Unfortunately, with all the questions that people ask, and the suspicions that they have– I know my confirmation or denial will come with a judgment. It’s natural, and especially in the Iranian-American community, a STAMP will be put on my forehead like a Scarlet letter.

‘S’ for Sex blogger. S for Scandal. S for shame.

I don’t care about my reputation (most of the time). But I care A LOT about my family and my friends. As much as I want to take credit for everything that I’ve done for this baby of mine, I know that there will be people who will shun not just me, but my family– and they will judge and talk sh!t.

My parents have done nothing but sacrifice for me and struggle to give me a blessed life. In return, I cannot make their life harder. I know they will stand by me even if they don’t understand, but that is not something I want to ask them to do. [Read more…]

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