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20 Things Persian Moms Don’t Like

In honor of Mother’s day, we’re going to list everything that has our Persian moms saying..

don't like

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1.  When you make fun of their english…

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2. When you talk back…

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3. When you bring people over unannounced…

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4. When you eat things before they offer it to you at a mehmooni

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5. When you don’t say “Salaam” or “Khodahafez” to every single person at a mehmooni

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6. When you call them out on their gossiping…

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7. When you don’t eat the food they cook..

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8. When other moms brag about their children..

michelle obama

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9. When you tell them they can be embarrassing sometimes…

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10. When you don’t share all your secrets…

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11. When you ask for ‘space’…

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12. When you forget your manners, in general

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13. When you don’t clean your room…

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14. When you don’t listen to them because you’re distracted by your phone/computer/TV…

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15. When you don’t formally offer up everything in the fridge and pantry to your friends…

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16. When you don’t answer 7 out of the 10 calls they make to you daily…

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17. When you get frustrated over the phone just because they’re asking if you ate all your fruits and veggies…

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18. When you try to teach them the politically correct way to refer to minorities…

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19. When you forget that they’re your best friend…

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20. When you forget Mother’s Day…

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What else would you add to this list?

My Personal Comedian

JOONS:

Happy Mother’s Day to all the beautiful and amazing mothers out there. We wouldn’t be here without you… literally.

resp

As an ode to Iranian mothers – I thought there is no better way to celebrate today than to tell you all a little about my mother. No horror stories… well depends on how you look at it.

My mom has always been dependent but that doesn’t mean she can’t stand up for herself. I remember YEARS ago (like 17… she was pregnant with my brother), we all went to France for my dad’s engineering conference. I was eight years old and we had been warned that “gypsies” pick pocket. We were crossing the street to go to some museum (memory is hazy on the exact place…) – when all of a sudden, a group of about eight women came at us.

My poor visor-wearing, knee high sock and sandal fashionisto dad froze and just put his hand on his back pocket to guard his wallet as one of the ladies attempted to yank the big ass video camera hanging from his shoulder. My mom tightens her grip on my hand, walks up to the lady, and slaps her across the face. Needless to say, they scattered pretty quickly after that.

bitch

My mom needs someone to take care of her, but when it comes to putting bitches in their place – she has no problem. [Read more…]

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